Coaching is not a “soft” option
Case Study
Coaching is sometimes perceived to be a soft option or even a perk, nothing could be further from the truth but coaches often face the challenges that these perceptions present. The following case gives some insight, all the references have been changed for reasons of confidentiality.
Stephen was a VP in his organisation and was being lined up for a larger role but had been given feedback about some areas he still needed to work on. His CEO had engaged a coach personally before with great success and was confident Stephen could benefit in the same way so had arranged for Stephen to be coached.
Stephen was not convinced but agreed to attend to keep the CEO happy. Stephen had heard about coaching and considered it to be a soft option, a bit of a cosy chat and felt his time would be better spent with an expert who could help him quickly overcome the feedback by telling him what he needed to do differently, after all he was a fast learner and wanted to sort this quickly so that he could progress into the role.
The first meeting was the key to how this coaching relationship would continue, (or not, as all good coaches will help the coachee find another coach if they think the chemistry is not right).
Stephen’s approach was to put up barriers and try to get the coach to tell him what he needed to do. The coach resisted the temptation to buckle under Stephen’s assertive behaviour but steadily built the relationship to the point where he was able to provide a significant challenge to Stephen through questions. This could have destroyed the relationship there and then, but the rapport was strong enough for the challenge to land effectively and after a long a difficult silence, (which the coach purposely allowed Stephen to fill with his own thoughts), Stephen opened up and revealed the real reason why he was struggling, (in the areas where he had received feedback).
There were some deep rooted confidence issues that Stephen had never shared with anyone. He couldn’t share them at work because he knew this would be seen as an even bigger weakness, and, for someone in his position to admit would be career suicide, yet here he was talking about them for the first time.
After the first session Stephen could not wait for the next and felt very motivated to work on the things his coach had helped him identify.
The final result after five sessions was that Stephen successfully addressed the feedback areas and went on to get the larger role.
He is now an advocate of coaching and says that he has never been challenged so much, but in a way that felt supportive at the same time. He no longer sees coaching as a “soft option”
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